the common pattern of female celebrities and their questionable partners
the ariana grande and ethan slater situation, with the hyuna and junhyung is not the first nor the last time, the reality sets in that you don't truly know these people
As I’m scrolling through Instagram and TikTok, I’ve noticed a common pattern that occurs quite frequently. From homewreckers to fake “girl’s girl”—a lot of female celebrities present themselves as sweet women who can do no wrong yet date very questionable men. Part of what makes it questionable is that humans often date or hang out with people with whom they share similar mindsets, beliefs or interests. The phrase “opposite attracts” is quite rarely seen. It is actually the people who share similar behaviours, interests, etc that get together—whether it is a friendship or romantic relationship. As they say sometimes, you are who you hang out with. This leads to the controversialness that occurs when a seemingly “progressive” woman who is a high-figure celebrity engages in a romantic relationship with a man who has done criminal and problematic things or is very conservative.
There are many examples but of course, the most prominent ones that are trending are the Ariana Grande and Ethan Slater situation, as well as the Hyuna and Junhung’s dating news. I think a very important lesson that we can learn is that at the end of the day, we don’t know these people. I’ve mentioned this in a previous substack where I discussed the dangers of parasocial relationships with celebrities, that the image they choose to present to the public is not who they are off-camera. Yet, time and time again people are shocked when issues like this arise, “exposing” them. Before reading this substack, I recommend doing thorough research on the Burning Sun Scandal (if you are not aware of it) for the later part of this article.
Trigger warning: mentions of suicide, rape and sexual assault are in this article.
Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater
I’m not going into the nitty-gritty details of this one as it is everywhere. For me, I was not surprised at all, as someone aware of Ariana’s dating history—she typically goes for men who are already in a relationship with someone else. So Ariana getting with Ethan Slater who divorced his wife and abandoned his baby is not news to me. However whenever discussions of Ariana being a homewrecker arise, especially now with her released song, yes and? her fans often argue back claiming that people only seem to heap the blame on Ariana and not on the man who willingly chose to divorce his wife and leave his child for a woman who in the next few months might potentially leave him for someone else. And I agree with this to an extent, Ethan deserves to be criticised and blamed for how he handled it. It is saddening that he left his wife Lilly Jay who was his high school sweetheart and gave him a son but it also reveals my main reason why if you’re not a celebrity, I wouldn’t recommend chasing after a celebrity to date them but that is another substack for another time.
While I’m not ruling Ethan out of the equation because as they say, it takes two to tango, and I believe Ariana didn’t steal Lilly’s man, she stole Lilly’s problem—Ariana still plays a huge role in this along with other things she has done that goes to show she is not necessarily the sweet, little angel that her fans and PR team present her to be. I cannot even fathom how I would react if my partner left me for Ariana Grande and the way she chooses to respond is to release a song, mocking the situation; a song that I will probably hear throughout the radio, shops, grocery stores, etc. It even makes it messier when you dig deeper and find out that Ariana held their baby and even liked Lilly’s posts of their child.
There are parts of Ariana’s behaviour that make you question her, from the doughnut situation where there was clear video evidence of her licking doughnuts at a bakery putting them back and being disrespectful to the employees to how she portrayed herself as many races groups and playing on the aesthetics within them to further market herself in her career to how she treated Mac Miller. Ariana is 31 years old and yet heavily depends on the ‘sad, petite, cute, looking-girl, i-can-fit-in-a-guitar-case’ image is a bit concerning. I usually try and have sympathy for Nickelodeon and Disney child actors as we don’t even know half of the horrid things they’ve been through but in Ariana Grande’s case, she makes it very difficult to be likeable.
Some people have claimed that she has tainted her image and ruined the reputation for the film but we all know how this plays out. Once the film comes out and is trending at the box office, her fans, PR team and everybody else will sweep this whole mess under the rug to “support her in this acting project.”
Hyuna & Junhung
Although I was never a Hyuna fan, I was fully aware that Hyuna was always viewed as an icon for women's empowerment within the entertainment industry and K-pop. She has always been outspoken on the issues that women face, releasing a lot of songs that touch on the topic of feminism and sensuality. Hyuna’s image was the polar opposite of what is expected from a typical, traditional female K-pop idol hence why her fanbase is predominately filled with women and young girls who look up to her as an example and admire her. So when Hyuna posted on her Instagram, a seemingly romantic picture of her and Junhung confirming that they are a couple, this came up as a shock for both international fans and knetz.
For context, Junhung is a former member of the group Highlight. He was affiliated with The Burning Sun scandal, which was a sex scandal in Seoul in 2019 where several of the most influential and famous male K-pop celebrities drugged and raped women, as well as shared explicit videos and pictures of women being raped. I would recommend watching Stephanie Soo’s explanation video on it and the links I have put in the sources below of the scandal might better assist your understanding of it. Although Junhung didn’t send or share any of the videos or photos, he admitted that he would watch the videos and was part of the main group chat that received the explicit photos and videos. This is the man that Hyuna chose to date.
I get very irritated when fans, especially K-pop fans, try and paint their K-pop idols as naive babies who only know how to sing and dance, and have no clue about what’s going on around them. Some of Hyuna’s fans trying to justify the relationship, asking things like, “Hyuna why are you with him?” “Hyuna, don’t date him” Hyuna this and Hyuna that. Hyuna is 31 years old. She’s a grown woman. She knows what she’s doing.
What makes this case even more controversial and messy is that Junhung is the ex-boyfriend of dead singer and actress, Goo Hara, who was also Hyuna’s best friend. Goo Hara committed suicide on 24th November 2019 because her ex-boyfriend (not Junhung, another man, Choi Jong-bum) threatened to destroy her career and reputation by leaking their sex videos. It was after Goo Hara was dead that Choi Jong-bum was sentenced to one year in prison on charges of assaulting and threatening Goo Hara, as well as violating digital laws based on sexual harassment after the police found photos of the Goo Hara taken without her consent. This was a huge talk in Korea and internationally on the rampant misogyny and sexism that goes on within South Korea and the Korean entertainment industry.
The cause of Goo Hara’s suicide was because of things like this, taking illegal photos and videos of her without her consent and using it against her. This same Goo Hara, who is Hyuna’s best friend. Now Hyuna decides to go after Goo Hara’s ex, Junhung. Such a good friend, Hyuna.
Now many of Hyuna’s fan accounts across several social media platforms have shut down, as well as many Korean celebrities unfollowing Hyuna, including EXID Hani, 2AM’s Jo Kwon, Former Miss A’s Meng Jia and many more. There have even been jokes online on how when both Knetz and international fans can agree on something, you know it’s serious, considering how most of the time knetz and international fans are often arguing because of different cultural views and points but it seems this time both groups can agree that what Hyuna did was show her true colours. Even if she’s not dating him, the fact that he is openly hated in Korea and she chose to affiliate herself with him not only has ruined her career but speaks volumes about the type of person she is.
Overall the moral of the story you can get from both these situations and many more is that you don’t know these celebrities. They’re not angels or mystical beings. The person that they are on camera or the supposed image or brand they push on to their fans is not necessarily the person they are in real life.
Hopefully, you’ll have more awareness.
Sources:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kFLuckWYBWg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6dWyZXeWIg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WMFVRGdt1xY
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rh7byBNXZdI
https://www.lowyinstitute.org/the-interpreter/burning-sun-scandal-torched-south-korea-s-elites
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/ariana-grande-controversy-new-song_n_65aa9e7de4b076abd7ab6a16
https://ca.news.yahoo.com/ariana-grande-lost-over-350-130026912.html
https://www.the-sun.com/entertainment/10135377/candace-owens-ariana-grande-song-yes-and-ethan/
https://pagesix.com/2023/07/27/ethan-slaters-estranged-wife-lilly-jay-blasts-ariana-grande/